I'm gonna have a badass scar
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
Let's get the cat blown out
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
Randomize
