"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
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