Kareoke will never be a sober sport
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
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