We should be called the Road Head Warriors
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
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