Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
