We should be called the Road Head Warriors
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
The Russian stripper asked if I like foreign girls. I told her I absolutely fucking hate accents. Most awkward 7 minutes ever
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
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