Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
Randomize
