I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
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