ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
I think I won the penis lottery.
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Randomize
