First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize
