I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
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