I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
I was so drunk I accidentally put in two tampons.
I tried to talk you out of it. You were worried about alcohol being a blood thinner.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
Randomize