North Korea, Best Korea!
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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