I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
Someone shattered a urinal.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
Randomize
