And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
Randomize
