whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
Randomize
