idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
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