he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Randomize
