There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize