no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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