the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
Randomize
