i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
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