Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
There are leaves in my underwear?
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
