Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
