TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
I intend to get homeless drunk
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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