So I went on a date with this girl...and whos our waitress? My girlfriend got a second job she didn't tell me about to afford my bday present.
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
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