so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
Randomize