AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
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