Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
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