I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
