you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
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