escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
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