im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
Randomize
