I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
Randomize
