I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Randomize
