hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
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