Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
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