you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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