Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
Randomize
