Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
one might say we're banned from that church
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
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