Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
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