Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Randomize
