White coat. Heels.
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize
