Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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