I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize
