Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
Randomize
