I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
Everything about him screamed your future.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
Randomize
