i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Randomize
