fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
whose parrot is this?
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
