She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
Randomize
